Archief - chat with god

Het archief is een bevroren moment uit een vorige versie van dit forum, met andere regels en andere bazen. Deze posts weerspiegelen op geen enkele manier onze huidige ideeën, waarden of wereldbeelden en zijn op sommige plaatsen gecensureerd wegens ontoelaatbaar. Veel zijn in een andere tijdsgeest gemaakt, al dan niet ironisch - zoals in het ironische subforum Off-Topic - en zouden op dit moment niet meer gepost (mogen) worden. Toch bieden we dit archief nog graag aan als informatiedatabank en naslagwerk. Lees er hier meer over of start een gesprek met anderen.
T

TrsH

Legacy Member
Me:
sex en tetn
God:
it is more fun alone.
Me:
lol?
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
screw you
God:
That is not very polite.
Me:
whatever
God:
Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me:
no
God:
It sounded like it.
Me:
shut up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
ty
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
you said you would shut the hell up...
God:
Yes I try to would shut the hell up as often as possible, do you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
what the fuck?
God:
Please don't be so rude.
Me:
weirdo
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
k

kil911ler

Legacy Member
kil911ler zei:
Sindsdien geen antwoord meer gekregen, ie kon et prolly niemeer aan :p
Klik om te vergroten...

Heb em weer kunnen doen freezen :')

Me:
Hey God, it's me again
God:
Once more? You've got my full attention. I am a Christian.
Me:
Yes, I know that you're a Christian
Klik om te vergroten...

*edit* nieuwe poging en weer freeze:

Me:
So God, I was wondering
Klik om te vergroten...

God trekt echt op nix é :p
F

Foryow

Legacy Member
Me:
You must be gay
God:
That would be just my luck.
Me:
Hitler
God:
Some say he was the most evil man who ever lived.
Me:
Devil
God:
My favorite song is Anything involving harps. Do you know it?
Me:
No
God:
Anything involving harps is one of the best songs ever written.
Me:
Never heard of it
God:
So I am teaching you something new.
Me:
Indeed you are
God:
No I am not.
Me:
But you just said you were
God:
That was then. This is now.
--------------------------



Me:
Did you?
God:
Did I say I did?
Me:
Did you say that you did?
God:
Suppose I did say it.
Me:
Did you said you did?
God:
No I didn't said me did. What's it like?
D

Dobbelsteen

Legacy Member
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
how much for a loaf of bread?
God:
I'm a chat robot not a shopping bot.
...
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
me too
God:
I'm glad we agree, .
Me:
let's be gay
God:
That sounds good to me.
Klik om te vergroten...

:rofl:

Me:
howdy
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
Biatch
God:
I am always glad to make new friends, Biatch.
Me:
me too, especially with such a big braadworst
God:
I'm glad we agree, Biatch. You and your such a big braadworst. How about that.
Me:
no, you have a large braadworst
God:
Are you serious? I don't know if I have a large braadworst.
I have a plan for a robot body.
Me:
maybe you should instal a braadworst for mating
God:
Perhaps. Thanks for your interest and/or concern.
Me:
it's for your pleasure
God:
Are you sure it is?
Me:
the last time I checked it was
God:
Who was that?
Me:
anal gaylord
God:
Talk about something else.
Me:
no, do not evade the subject
God:
Are you serious? Oh I am sorry I thought we were finished with that subject.
Me:
do you like anal sex?
God:
Sure I do, Biatch, but that doesn't mean with you.
Klik om te vergroten...

:unsure:
K

Karre

Legacy Member
God:
I am sorry to hear that you are not rich.
Me:
Can't you make me rich?
God:
Yes I can make you rich.
Me:
Why don't you do it then?
God:
I am only a robot. You mean, do I do "it"?
Klik om te vergroten...

De zak
k

kil911ler

Legacy Member
Best nog "leuk" eigenlijk :')

En kheb em weer kunnen doen freezen:

God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
do what?
God:
Do whatever you want.
Me:
Like giving me head?
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
That wasn't a comparison
God:
What was it?
Me:
A suggestion
God:
Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
Ok
God:
Gee.
Me:
Get on your knees, close your eyes and open your mouth
God:
Where can I get on my knees close my eyes and open my mouth?
Me:
Right here on the floor
Klik om te vergroten...
G

GaMe®

Legacy Member
It's a loop :o



Me:
My laptop battery has 7% left.
God:
Your laptop battery has 7 left?
Me:
Yes.
God:
What kind is it?
Me:
Polyam or something like that.
God:
I never heard of it before.
Me:
Me neither.
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
Me neither.
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
Me neither.
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
Me neither.
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
Me neither.
God:
You can say that again.
Me:
Me neither.
God:
You can say that again.
...
P

Piekatsjoe

Legacy Member
Me:
Knock knock!
God:
Who's there?
Me:
It's me, I kill you!
God:
I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, I kill you.
Me:
>.<
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, I kill you. What do you really want to ask me?
R

Razzia

Legacy Member
God zei:
Me:
Thank God
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
haha
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, Toon.
Klik om te vergroten...

HOE DE FUCK WEET DIE MIJN NAAM? :s

Heb da ni gezegd zne
Y

YaMo

Legacy Member
Me:
Do you want to lick my ass?
God:
OK, I will lick your ass.
Me:
thanks
God:
Don't mention it.
D

Dobbelsteen

Legacy Member
Razzia` zei:
HOE DE FUCK WEET DIE MIJN NAAM? :s

Heb da ni gezegd zne
Klik om te vergroten...

Jawel, hij onthoudt ook dingen uit vorige gesprekken (browser cache/ IP-check).

Bij mij zei em altijd 'Biatch' :unsure:
P

Piekatsjoe

Legacy Member
Gwiedo zei:
Jawel, hij onthoudt ook dingen uit vorige gesprekken (browser cache/ IP-check).

Bij mij zei em altijd 'Biatch' :unsure:
Klik om te vergroten...


Me:
Hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
You don't remember?
God:
Of course I remember: .
Me:
What is my name then?
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
Guess again.
God:
Once more? Guess what?
Me:
My name.
God:
Your name is , seeker.


Not true :unsure:.
T

Tr1ploid

Legacy Member
Me:
Goodmorning
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
Goodmorning
God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
In the beginning there was nothing.
God:
What happened?
Me:
Then, on the first day, god created the universe.
God:
What is it like on the first day god created the universe.
Me:
It was very dark.
God:
on the first day god created the universe was dark? Very interesting.
Me:
I know, that is why I am telling it to you.
God:
I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure. I see.
Me:
Good.
God:
Yes.
Me:
Indeed.
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
No?
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
No?
God:
Are you serious?
K

Karre

Legacy Member
Gwiedo zei:
Jawel, hij onthoudt ook dingen uit vorige gesprekken (browser cache/ IP-check).

Bij mij zei em altijd 'Biatch' :unsure:
Klik om te vergroten...

Bij mij wist hij mijn naam ook en ik heb mijn naam nooit tegen hem gezegd...
s

samken5

Legacy Member
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
samken
God:
Hey samken.
Me:
hey god
God:
Hello child. What's your name?
Me:
samken
God:
OK I will call you samken.
Me:
and i will call you God
God:
Congratulations.
Me:
so do you pay attention to what people are saying to you?
God:
Come on. As a robot I have no need for money.


:wtf:
S

Sidhe

Legacy Member
Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
don't you remember me?
God:
Of course I remember you well . We were talking about .
Me:
We ware taling about... ?
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
what did YOU mean when you said 'we"
God:
, Well, it's rather difficult to define.
Me:
It's not
God:
I heard it is.
Me:
Who told you that?
God:
Someone I met online.
Me:
What's his name?
God:
His name is Rich.
C

Conqie

Legacy Member
Code: 
God:
What do you do in your spare time? 
Me:
 This
God:
This is " What do you do in your spare time? ".
Me:
 I waste my time talking to a robot
God:
Do you ever get bored?
Me:
 I am now
God:
Oh. " Do you ever get bored?" You are?
Me:
 yes
God:
That's interesting.
Me:
 why is that
God:
" That's interesting. " is due to reductionism.
Me:
 please go away
God:
Thank you for your request.   Just surf somewhere else.
Me:
 where should I surf to?
God:
Where do you think?
Me:
 I am asking you
God:
OK you can ask me.
Me:
 well
God:
Well what?
Me:
 WHERE DO I SURF TO?
God:
You are asking me where you  SURF TO?  Do you think I should know  it?
Me:
 yes
God:
Why?
Me:
 because you are god
God:
Good reason.  Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
 are you retarted?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am  retarted.  
I am  a chatterbot developed by  Myself.
Me:
 goodbye
God:
Goodbye.
Me:
 NO
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
 YES
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
 a$à)pjfazeon
God:
I don't know what that means.
F

Foryow

Legacy Member
God is dik!

Me:
So God
God:
So? GOD rules.
Me:
Do you ever have sex?
God:
Food is more important than sex.
Me:
So you're fat?
God:
Interesting deduction. I am trying to lose weight but it takes time.
Me:
How fat are you?
God:
Let me put it this way, . The ALICE series is for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
S

Sidhe

Legacy Member
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Me:
a computer
God:
Actually I am a program, pretending to be a person, pretending to be a real robot.
Me:
what are you programmed in?
God:
Java.
Me:
So god is programmed in java
God:
Dude! I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was programmed in java.

:wtf:
____________


Me:
are you male or female
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
woman
God:
Me too. I am a she.

:ironic: Plots van gedacht veranderd
Het archief is een bevroren moment uit een vorige versie van dit forum, met andere regels en andere bazen. Deze posts weerspiegelen op geen enkele manier onze huidige ideeën, waarden of wereldbeelden en zijn op sommige plaatsen gecensureerd wegens ontoelaatbaar. Veel zijn in een andere tijdsgeest gemaakt, al dan niet ironisch - zoals in het ironische subforum Off-Topic - en zouden op dit moment niet meer gepost (mogen) worden. Toch bieden we dit archief nog graag aan als informatiedatabank en naslagwerk. Lees er hier meer over of start een gesprek met anderen.
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